Suzy Ayers
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Control #freeread #poetry and #song Sara Evans Slow Me Down

12/12/2014

2 Comments

 
Control

12/12/14

Losing control,
I don’t like this feeling.

What is happening to me?
Why am I telling all my secrets?
Why am I so confused?

Frantically back-peddling,
I keep saying these impulsive words.

What do I care?
Why am I suddenly this vulnerable mess?
Why am I so lost?

Trust is a burden I bear with a weak heart.
I don’t know what has changed, but the control within me is shattered.
Pieces of it drain out like a sputtering car leaking oil, as it drags its back wheels.

Losing control,
I don’t like this feeling.

What is he thinking?
Why am I clinging so hard?
Why am so stuck inside my head?

Scolding myself,
I slam my phone down, shaking my head.

What the fuck?
Why can’t I get a grip?
Where is my control?

It’s gone…I’m gone…

2 Comments

The Last Time #poetry

6/27/2014

2 Comments

 
This is a very emotional and personal piece. Please keep all negativity where it belongs. To yourself.
THE LAST TIME

Too many nights spent waiting listening for the door
Too many nights looking at the phone

A text
A call
Tears
They fall

Promises
Broken promises

Tomorrow you’re told it won’t happen again
You’re told they will change
They will stop going out with the guys.
Out for: sports, golf, soccer, rugby, softball, hunting, fishing, trips—away

Away
Always away
Always wishing for that someday
Someday

But that someday will never come.
Your mind burns with hurtful thoughts
What if I’m not sexy?
No longer beautiful
No longer enough
No longer…

You ask, despite your stomach lurches, is she prettier
Like a crack of thunder your temper flares
How do you dare?
Me?

She’s not yet 3 months and he only 2.
Why can’t I make him happy?
What is wrong with me?

NOTHING

Nothing I’ve realized is wrong with me
Nothing is more beautiful than the love I have for my children
Nothing is more powerful than standing up for me and saying…

This is the last time

No more.

2 Comments

#poem "Hidden" #freeread

3/4/2014

0 Comments

 
3/4/14

Hidden

Snow in winter
           hides the harsh bitter pain
Under each sprinkling of fresh powder
           lies a patch of unforeseen ice
Behind each drift
           another demon

But I push through—barreling forward

Sometimes slipping
           always gripping
To that façade
            that mask
Keeping that fence
            a barrier to block the hurt

Hidden behind are things that haunt even me, my dreams, and my waking life.

0 Comments

The Key #freeread #poetry

1/17/2014

1 Comment

 
Picture
The key to my heart

The key to happiness

The key to love

The key to me

Maybe roses, sometimes chocolates, perhaps sweet nothings, but most of all understand me.

To know me..that is

THE KEY.

1 Comment

"Owned By Sir" by @HisKittyWilde #freeread #guestpost

10/22/2013

0 Comments

 
A new follower of mine had this posted on their Twitter; I asked if I could post on my blog and share with you all. She shares a space on her husbands blog. A warm welcome to them both and a special thanks for following and congrats to being newlyweds as well.

Enjoy everyone!
Owned By Sir

I never thought you'd take me here,
A place where trust can conquer fear.
My peace is found beneath your touch,
My love is pain - I love too much.

I place myself in your control,
So tenderly you touch my soul,
But tease and whip my body sore,
To use me as your private whore.

Still soaking in my ecstasy,
I beg for you to stay with me,
For nothing makes this Kitty purr,
As much as being owned by Sir.

~HisKittyWilde

Follow her on Twitter: @HisKittyWilde
Follow her Blog: wildedesires.com
0 Comments

Roses aren't always red #poetry

6/26/2013

0 Comments

 
Picture
6/21/13
Roses aren’t always red

Roses aren’t always red
They aren’t always perfectly curled shells, tightly swirled together
They may not have the beautiful dew collected inside to catch the early morning sunlight

The patterned edges may be frayed, they may be decayed
But inhale and you will smell their sweet scent

Touch them and they still feel silken, and delicate
Ignore them and they whither and brown
Their petals will fall like tears

Forget to care for them and they will wilt, and begin to grow wild
They will forge a new path, their own way
0 Comments

Drunkness #poetry

6/21/2013

0 Comments

 
3/1/01
Drunkness

a mixture of juices
you stir into a tornado like frenzy
until the container is about to burst
the mixture begins to spill over the edges

what was once a cool and calm mixture begins to seep out warm and sticky as it slides between your fingers
an explosion occurs, but you don’t back away or back down
you continue to hold everything together in your now sweet and sticky hands
0 Comments

Hope #poetry

6/20/2013

0 Comments

 
6/20/13

Hope

I close the slider from the cool summer breeze that’s filled my bedroom
-fresh cut grass and the smells that come after a cleansing rain remain

I settle into the soft sheets, alone, the stillness and quiet surround me
-peaceful feelings bathe over me, a hope is taunting me, just out of reach

I toss and turn, but not in sleeplessness, rather in fantasy.

In want.

In desire.

In hope.

0 Comments

The Moment #poetry

6/10/2013

0 Comments

 
12/1/99

The Moment

Toes warm by the heat of the fire
My hand warm by the grasp you have
Thoughts freeze from words you say
My breath blows in cold clouds

Your heart pours into mine
My eyes weep, as your words stick to my mind like slow pouring honey
I kiss you and tell you I love you
Arms entrap me and protect me
0 Comments

Off My Mind #Poetry

6/5/2013

0 Comments

 
Misty Blue—Etta James Song Inspiration
Posted on Robert Zimmerman's Blog on 5/22/13
5/5/13
Off My Mind

My stomach flutters with each message, each email, each vibration of my phone…hoping
I lost it, that connection, that thread…the spiders web thread is thinning
Shimmering in the sunlight, making me smile, despite the tears rimming my eyes
Each flowering tree, each swan in the pond…they all remind me of you
Each day that passes, I feel the distance and the pain begins to dissipate like a fog warmed by the sun
I sense I will be forever changed and grateful for having you in my heart and life
And I know…I know it’s dangerous to allow you to do it to me again
I need to get you off my mind, away from my heart, and out of my life
0 Comments
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    These stories and poems are mine and/or other authors are not to be copied and used on any other platform without consent from me/and or the other author.

    Suzy Ayers

    Here is where you will get to taste me for free. It will include short stories, excerpts, poetry; as well as any other author's shorts who wish to have their work posted.

    All of Suzy Ayers books on Amazon can be found here (click on this link)

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